Lent- Know my Heart

Do you have one of those friends who has been with you through it all? Maybe you have a friend who has seen your absolute worst and your absolute best. If you can still call them your friend, you are blessed. I can think of three women in my life who have done just that for me. I consider them my sisters.

Do you remember what it was like moving in with your roommate at college? Or better yet, moving in with your husband? (Living with a man is very different than a female roomie.) They smell your dirty socks. Sometimes they'll even wash them for you (need I mention underwear?). They see how sloppy or neat you are. They know how well you cook. They know if you snore or talk in your sleep. They know how long you take in the bathroom in the morning. They have seen all of you. Your husband knows all of you; every curve, dimple and ticklish spot.

David writes, "Know my heart." This is the kind of knowing he is talking about. He has already asked God to search him. Searching and knowing are similar, but knowing gets a lot more personal. Knowing involves emotion and vulnerability. Knowing, for me at least, includes wondering what the other person is going to do or think when they have completed the search.
So David wants God to know his heart. If you don't dive into what David meant by "heart," you miss the gravity of his request. "Heart" can be translated as anger, conscientiousness, courage, desire, intelligence and purpose. Someone said (and I don't remember who) "It is the center of the human spirit, from which springs emotions, thought, motivation, courage and action." David is asking God to go into the areas that can be very dirty and touchy.
It is no wonder that the writer of Proverbs said, "Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life." (Prov. 4, 23).

Through this study and other input, God is going into those places in me right now. I can't say that it is pleasant, but I am at peace. I know that I am in good hands. I know that he can handle my doubts.