Sunday, December 25, 2011
Monday, December 19, 2011
Multitude Mondays #581-595
Our rush to the ER and the following sickness that is still lingering in our home really have depleted me this past week. I went to bed last night, my body aching with exhaustion. Right now, I would rather be back in my bed. But, the boys are awake, neglected housework is smugly grinning in triumph and I really need to figure out what we are going to eat this week.
Ann Voskamp in One Thousand Gifts says that Thanksgiving always precedes the miracle. I could use a miracle today. So here we go:
581) sleep, sleep, sleep
582) no vomiting in the last 24 hours
583) a soft and clean bed to sleep in
584) new Christmas ornament with a picture of Max on it that makes me laugh out loud every time I look at it
585) Michi is home
586) being able to go to the grocery store
587) Skype calls with Mom and Dad
588) Skype calls with Andrea and Clemens
589) Joey's incredible hard work
590) Joey being rewarded for his hard work
591) heat in the house
592) wine from Austria
593) English Muffins with butter and hot tea
594) time to write with a specific event in mind
595) Will wearing underwear over his pajamas
Ann Voskamp in One Thousand Gifts says that Thanksgiving always precedes the miracle. I could use a miracle today. So here we go:
581) sleep, sleep, sleep
582) no vomiting in the last 24 hours
583) a soft and clean bed to sleep in
584) new Christmas ornament with a picture of Max on it that makes me laugh out loud every time I look at it
585) Michi is home
586) being able to go to the grocery store
587) Skype calls with Mom and Dad
588) Skype calls with Andrea and Clemens
589) Joey's incredible hard work
590) Joey being rewarded for his hard work
591) heat in the house
592) wine from Austria
593) English Muffins with butter and hot tea
594) time to write with a specific event in mind
595) Will wearing underwear over his pajamas
Thursday, December 15, 2011
Gratitude #570-580
570) grace that the cut was not worse
571) that Joey was already on his way home
572) for hospitals, doctors and nurses only 15 minutes away
573) for 7 stitches that bind the wound together
574) for restful nights
575) for Max's appetite coming back
576) for prayer for Max going to the Lord from many different people
577) praying with Joey for our family
578) that God's grace really is sufficient in need
579) being able to walk boldly into today knowing that God will supply all things
580) for help waiting for Joey last night - a burden lifted.
571) that Joey was already on his way home
572) for hospitals, doctors and nurses only 15 minutes away
573) for 7 stitches that bind the wound together
574) for restful nights
575) for Max's appetite coming back
576) for prayer for Max going to the Lord from many different people
577) praying with Joey for our family
578) that God's grace really is sufficient in need
579) being able to walk boldly into today knowing that God will supply all things
580) for help waiting for Joey last night - a burden lifted.
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Advent 2011
So far Advent this year hasn't been quietly meditative. Honestly, I just have a lot of questions about a lot of different things. So this picture is a good representation of where we are as a family. Max is missing because of sickness and injury. The table is not cleared, but remnants from the day before still wait to be put away. It's a simple meal, but provided from the hand of God. The picture isn't even straight.
So Advent hasn't been romantic or idyllic or even clean. But God can handle the messy, right?
I am choosing to believe that God can handle my questions. He can handle my mouth that can spew venom. He can hold my heart that is broken at the sight of my son. He knows my tiredness at the thought of a possible rough night and my overwhelmed mind with its to-do lists.
So maybe it is in the messy that I can pray most authentically, "Oh come, oh come Immanuel." Maybe Advent isn't really supposed to be romantic after all. Maybe Advent is a desperate cry; a clinging to the goodness of God; and the watchful wait for our hope to become sight.
So Advent hasn't been romantic or idyllic or even clean. But God can handle the messy, right?
I am choosing to believe that God can handle my questions. He can handle my mouth that can spew venom. He can hold my heart that is broken at the sight of my son. He knows my tiredness at the thought of a possible rough night and my overwhelmed mind with its to-do lists.
So maybe it is in the messy that I can pray most authentically, "Oh come, oh come Immanuel." Maybe Advent isn't really supposed to be romantic after all. Maybe Advent is a desperate cry; a clinging to the goodness of God; and the watchful wait for our hope to become sight.
Monday, December 12, 2011
Multitude Mondays #559- 569
559) my book club
560) your patience, oh Lord, in me opening my hand to your will and timing of my writing
561) that God loves on me even when I don't choose to see it
562) forgiveness
563) belly laughter of anticipation coming from William
564) the aroma of a newly opened box of peppermint tea
565) this computer
566) our church- God's grace to us
567) little boys with home-made light sabers
568) Will's dimples
569) reading The Horse and His Boy to Max at nap time
560) your patience, oh Lord, in me opening my hand to your will and timing of my writing
561) that God loves on me even when I don't choose to see it
562) forgiveness
563) belly laughter of anticipation coming from William
564) the aroma of a newly opened box of peppermint tea
565) this computer
566) our church- God's grace to us
567) little boys with home-made light sabers
568) Will's dimples
569) reading The Horse and His Boy to Max at nap time
Thursday, December 8, 2011
Having a Four-Year-Old
Four years old. He is growing up so fast. I can hardly keep up. More and more of his personality is showing and I am in awe of who God has made him to be. I pray with all my heart that Joey and I raise him to look to God in all things and for all things.
In the meantime, I'll enjoy the superhero adventures we have together, the nap time readings of Charlotte's Web or some book from Narnia, the really weird humor that comes with his age, the dandelions he picks for me to put into my hair (that later fall out of my hair and freak me out because they feel like bugs), the burping followed by gales of laughter, and the endless questions.
And when I forget to enjoy because of a cluttered kitchen, or an empty fridge that needs to be stocked, or a floor that needs to be swept, I hope that I am reminded that love is always patient first. Patient to see what the true need is. Patient enough to put my own to-do list aside. Patient to be the best Super Woman I can be (which does not involve any of the tasks mentioned above, but rather fighting imaginary bad guys and following my four-year-old Spiderman's lead.)
In the meantime, I'll enjoy the superhero adventures we have together, the nap time readings of Charlotte's Web or some book from Narnia, the really weird humor that comes with his age, the dandelions he picks for me to put into my hair (that later fall out of my hair and freak me out because they feel like bugs), the burping followed by gales of laughter, and the endless questions.
And when I forget to enjoy because of a cluttered kitchen, or an empty fridge that needs to be stocked, or a floor that needs to be swept, I hope that I am reminded that love is always patient first. Patient to see what the true need is. Patient enough to put my own to-do list aside. Patient to be the best Super Woman I can be (which does not involve any of the tasks mentioned above, but rather fighting imaginary bad guys and following my four-year-old Spiderman's lead.)
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
Clean and Folded!
Just thought I would share an accomplishment of the day. Clean and folded laundry. You gotta celebrate the small things when tomorrow there will probably be another Mt. Everest of laundry avalanching onto my floor.
Hurray for getting something done during nap time!
Hurray for getting something done during nap time!
Multitude Mondays # 541-558 (on Tuesday)
541) Making the Adventkranz (advent wreath)
542) Feeling closer to Austria because of the wreath
543) the scent of pine
544) Max, "I believe Jesus."
545) running
546) Will sleeping in
547) glittering frost on leaves - the world covered in diamonds
548) foggy mornings
549) Will's love of the picture book of animals
550) Singing "danke, dass du mich so liebst" upon Will's request
551) The hope of the Total Money Makeover by David Ramsey
552) dancing with Joe in the kitchen to "The Way You Look Tonight"
553) decorating the tree with the boys and Michi
554) Gulasch
555) dinner with friends last night
556) Dexter, Max and Will group hug
557) supporting Oneiry through Compassion International
558) Too Small to Ignore by Wess Stafford
Friday, December 2, 2011
Hope
It was five years ago today - a bloody show the size of a quarter, and thus began a very dark time. The baby was only six weeks old. Old enough for facial features to start forming and the heart to be beating around 100 times a minute. Old enough to have captured my heart.
I hardly had baby when suddenly it was gone. The cramps of the miscarriage didn’t even come close to the spasms of my heart that manifested themselves through hot tears, numbness, anger and collapsing in the light of the moon in the front yard in bitter grief. For a while I wondered how I was ever going to go through Advent and celebrate Christmas when I felt loss in every cell of my body. But it turned out that Advent began to heal me.
The moon has always been a sign of God’s faithfulness to me because I have always been able to see it’s orb regardless of which continent I have been on. And so, getting out of the car after spending a very lonely time in an ER corridor because I had been forgotten, I was surrounded by the glow of the moon and knew that I was not forgotten by God. In trying to sooth my aching body in the shower the next morning, I couldn’t help but whisper- sing, “Great is Thy Faithfulness.” It comforted me just as much as the running water.
Advent that year taught me what it is we are really waiting for. It is the hope and comfort that comes from knowing the God with us. Knowing Emmanuel. I was able to celebrate the birth of a baby even after the death of my own because the child that was born 2000 years ago, lived so that death does not have the final word. That is what I clung to, and that is what I rejoiced in even with an ache in my heart that has never quite vanished.
My prayer for you is that you find the hope of the King-child this Advent season.
I hardly had baby when suddenly it was gone. The cramps of the miscarriage didn’t even come close to the spasms of my heart that manifested themselves through hot tears, numbness, anger and collapsing in the light of the moon in the front yard in bitter grief. For a while I wondered how I was ever going to go through Advent and celebrate Christmas when I felt loss in every cell of my body. But it turned out that Advent began to heal me.
The moon has always been a sign of God’s faithfulness to me because I have always been able to see it’s orb regardless of which continent I have been on. And so, getting out of the car after spending a very lonely time in an ER corridor because I had been forgotten, I was surrounded by the glow of the moon and knew that I was not forgotten by God. In trying to sooth my aching body in the shower the next morning, I couldn’t help but whisper- sing, “Great is Thy Faithfulness.” It comforted me just as much as the running water.
Advent that year taught me what it is we are really waiting for. It is the hope and comfort that comes from knowing the God with us. Knowing Emmanuel. I was able to celebrate the birth of a baby even after the death of my own because the child that was born 2000 years ago, lived so that death does not have the final word. That is what I clung to, and that is what I rejoiced in even with an ache in my heart that has never quite vanished.
My prayer for you is that you find the hope of the King-child this Advent season.
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